Name :: Georgia Fish

Date of Birth :: 11-05-1993

Profession :: WQS tour surfer and Piping Hot team rider

Hailing from Flinders on the Mornington Penninsula, Georgia Fish is one of 
Victoria’s most prominent and powerful female surfers. Georgia has won Rip Curl Gromsearch events across the country and placed second in arguably the world’s biggest and most prestigious U/16 event, the Rusty Gromfest.

Since then she has taken out multiple divisions in the All Girls Surf Showdown and is now under way with her full time assault on the ASP Pro Junior Series and WQS. With multiple overseas adventures to the Maldives, the Mentawais and Indonesia and having finished year 12 at Toorak College, Georgia has wisdom beyond her years and the world at her feet.

Georgia is independent, full of endless energy and no fear – always the first to put her hand up to try something new. At age 9 she discovered surfing and hasn’t looked back. Georgia is now well on her way towards her major goal: to qualify for the WCT, become World Champion and make a profession out of her passion!

:: How did you initially get into surfing?

I was doing nippers down at Point Leo beach in Victoria and I made a friend this one particular day and she asked me if I wanted to try and surf the nipper boards with her in the half foot shore break and it all really started from that afternoon, I loved it!

:: What age did you start surfing?

8 years old.

:: How old were you when you competed in your first comp?

Around 11 years old.

:: Biggest achievements to date?

Finishing in the quarter finals (5^th) place, In the last two events of 2012… then finishing 20^th on the world rankings.

:: What’s coming up this year?

Currently sitting in the airport about to go to Sumatra for a week then continue on to the Andaman islands in India… basically this year is just a lot of amazing travel, a lot of high intensity training and trying to get my fitness and surfing level to its peak.

:: How do you handle stress in your life?

By keeping positive, happy and loving people around me. Keeping a good balance, good health and a positive outlook.

:: How do you motivate yourself?

I think about the times of when I’ve worked my butt off and achieved something and how amazing it felt. I always look for inspiration from other successful people and see how having motivation can be so rewarding. The harder you work, the luckier you become.

:: How often/when do you feel pressure and anxiety and how you handle it?


I feel pressure and anxiety extremely often. I think it’s a part of this stage of my life and the things that are going on around me. Basically I find it really important to keep a balance and be around people I love.

:: What you do to relax and calm yourself when stress hits?

I usually try to use some breathing exercises, yoga, and always try to take a step back and relax. It’s hard to do sometimes, but if you have the right strategies implemented generally you can find a way to bring yourself back to a relaxed state.

“Be brave. Have fun. Take care… Nurture your dreams, because everything you wish for lies inside you. It’s just waiting for you to discover it” ~ Maggie Hamilton

Part scrapbook, part help guide, Maggie Hamilton becomes the guru of all things vintage and creative for girls “fed up with bland conformity” in Secret Girls’ Business.

Covering a range of lifestyle areas, the book includes tips and advice on love, fashion, craft, food, fun, imagination and friendships in the least lecture-like voice possible.

Each page is new and exciting just like your road to adulthood is sure to be! Pops of colour whip across pages filled with different images and textures that make each entry interesting to look at. This gives the guide a real scrapbook feel to it making it a fun, entertaining and inspirational read.

This book sets out to inspire its readers to lead creative lives. The guide features insightful profiles of fashion and craft bloggers and vintage lovers. Jessica from littlehenrylee.blogspot.com.au shares her ideas on what to do with inspirational notes, cards and postcards.

Sarah from abeachcottage.com instructs readers how to jazz up their bedrooms with beach cottage drawers. While Emily from awelldressedhome.com suggests revamping your bedroom with pages from old books.

Throughout the book, Hamilton offers a scattering of advice on topics such as careers, life, love, fashion, food and craft. A notable addition to the guide are the entries on “grandma magic” that provide handy hints on how to get rid of stains, smelly shoes and washing clothes.

Hamilton proves she is in touch with our multicultural society via a series of readers’ cultural profiles The profiles feature Indian, Vietnamese, Jewish and Iraqi girls with a summary of their life and what makes their culture important.

One of the best parts of life is discovering great food and Hamilton doesn’t fail to neglect in offering some delicious recipes to her readers. Easy to make at home and highly affordable, you can learn to make quiche, egg sandwiches, royal meringue pudding, cupcakes and lemon delicious!

And the fresh ideas don’t stop there with plenty of unique, crafty activities to keep you entertained on a rainy day. Start a button jar, go to a trash and treasure market, frame your handkerchiefs, collect shells or create an inspirational photo board!

Secret Girl’s Business is saturated with colour and filled to the brim with photo collages and quirky insights on young adult life! You’ll want to check out this book to get your creative juices flowing as well as hearing some useful life advice.

// CONTRIBUTOR

Olivia Windsor :: Book Reviewer

A Melbourne city girl through and through, Olivia is a Communications student at RMIT. A lover of literature, cinema and adventure, she yearns to travel. Olivia belongs to the world of performance, dancing classical ballet, jazz and contemporary. As such, her closet is overflowing with tutus, sequins and sparkly leotards.

Enchanted by the bright lights of the stage, she’s drawn to the glitz and glamour of the world of beauty and thrives on good quality coffee. Follow her at  https://twitter.com/#!/oliviawindsor and read her blog  http://olivialouisewindsor.wordpress.com/

Here are some common examples:

// Boys

Your new boyfriend bring up sex for the first time. You say you’re not ready yet and you want to wait. He says “If you loved me, you’d have sex with me.” This is waaay over-stepping the line. If HE loved YOU, HE would agree to wait until you’re ready.

Never settle for any guy that says this to you, as it is a clear, flashing, neon sign saying he does not respect you, is using you for sex, or both. Giving in to emotional blackmail for sex will leave you feeling unhappy, used and mistreated, when it should be bringing you feelings of happiness, love and mutual respect in a healthy relationship.

// Friends

“But you have to because you love me!” is a common line amongst friends, and it’s an extremely effective thing to say because who wants to let a friend down? Here’s an example: A friend wants you to go with her to a party, shopping or to someone else’s house. You really don’t want to go because you’ve got your own plans. She says to you, “If you loved me, you’d come with me” and you’re instantly guilted into going with her. Sound familiar?

// Family

Your brother or sister comes into your room and asks you for money. You say no. They say, “If you love me, you’ll lend me some money”.

Family is very important and should always look out for each other, but again, this is crossing the line. Just because you’re family, doesn’t mean you have an obligation to hand over your hard-earned cash. If you find yourself justifying it with ‘well, I’m not saving for anything so it doesn’t really matter…’ You don’t need to make excuses. It’s your money, and if any part of you is saying no, just tell them no. They’ll always be your family, no matter what.

Saying no to someone close to you and seeing their face fall into a sad, disappointed frown can bring about the guiltiest feelings ever, especially if you’re one of those people that does everything in their power to please everyone in their lives. This isn’t necessarily a bad thing, I know a lot of good people like this, but I’ve also witnessed too many situations where it’s not possible to please everyone.

There is always going to be someone that doesn’t get what they want. And if you putting everyone first results in you not getting what you want, then it’s definitely crossing the line. Don’t let yourself be emotionally blackmailed into something you don’t want to do. Being able to say no is a fundamental part of life and emotional control, and will bring you much more happiness than guilt in the long-term. Give it a go! It is probably one of the most self-empowering things you can possibly do.

// CONTRIBUTOR

Mala McAlpin :: Editor-in-Chief

A Beauty Therapist by trade and currently studying a degree in Journalism, Mala hopes to take the beauty world by storm by one day becoming a beauty editor for an international beauty magazine while simultaneously freelancing hair, makeup artistry and everything else beauty.

She thrives on good coffee, has a ridiculously large and ever-growing makeup collection, and adores everything gorgeous and girly: 50s glamour, macaroons, French chic decor, Audrey movies, chiffon and flouncy blouses, high waisted pencil skirts and kitten heels. Her dream is to live in Paris and speak fluent French. Click here to read her blog ‘The French Room’.

I also remember the times my mum nagged me. To clean my room, do an assignment, apologise to my sister, or clean the bathroom (my weekly job). It was tiring and annoying having her constantly peering over my shoulder telling me what to do, and how to do it.

I’m sure you’re in the same boat. Maybe your parents don’t like your artistic way of spreading your clothes all over the floor like a rainbow. They may be less than thrilled about the foundation stains in the bathroom and super unimpressed with your report card. They may even resort to threats like “I’ll throw this out if you don’t clean it up” or even sending you to a boarding school if you don’t get your act together.

So how can you get the oldies off your back so you can enjoy life?

Below are the steps to help get your life organised. Getting a few systems in place will make your oldies see what a responsible person you are, and they’re going to back off. The more you can show them you’re taking steps to live a more organised life, the more fun they’re going to let you have. Plus they’ll be nicer to you, which means you won’t want to write nasty things in your diary about them anymore.

// Fresh Start

It has to be said – if your room looks neat and tidy, your mind is clearer. So if you’re stressing over an assignment, a friend problem or a hot crush, your room usually reflects how you feel emotionally. Giving your room a clean up, will help you sort through the emotional issue at the same time. I don’t just mean a 15-minute sweep-it-all-into-the-cupboard clean either. I mean a good declutter.

Chuck out (donate) the clothes, shoes, make up accessories, etc. that you no longer like, or need. Use a plastic bag for rubbish and one for donations. Pull down the posters or pics that no longer inspire you. Give your room a good clean while you’re there. A dirty or dusty room equals poor health so giving your room a thorough clean will energise you so you can take on the world!

//Set the Space

Once you’ve finished the declutter look at the items you’ve got left. If you’re a normal teen you should have chucked out at least a quarter to a half of your stuff. Getting a fresh start will help you maintain a good system in the long run. Now look at your systems. Do you have a desk or space to study? Create one. Make sure it’s got all the stationery you need there. Keep the desktop clear and don’t mix your study space up with make up, DVDs or anything else. You need to be able to focus on your assignments when you sit there, not be distracted by testing out that new eye shadow.

Do you need a basket for dirty clothes? Keeping your dirties in a basket that you can take to the laundry and wash every week will be a lifesaver. Your mum will think you’re a legend and you’ll stop adding emotional clutter to your brain with that floordrobe. You may need other tubs for shoes or baskets for special items (we recommend every person has a Memory Box to put their Memorabilia into). Have a chat to your mum if you need to but get your room organised with the proper storage. Once you have a physical boundary (i.e. A sock drawer) you can’t overfill the boundary. That means if your socks reproduce and explode out of the drawer, you’ve got to chuck out a few.

// Create good habits

Your parents will think you’ve had a lobotomy but will love it heaps more if you can implement some good habits. Putting your school stuff away as soon as you get home and putting items back after you’re finished with them is like a dream come true for parents. They’ll think you’re super responsible and leave you alone. They may even be more likely to let you go to that party…

Here are a couple of tips, which are sure to keep your parents off your back.

• Put stuff away after you’ve used it
• Do some homework before jumping on Facebook
• Clear your desk daily, before bed
• Spend time each weekend cleaning your room
• Each time a new item comes into your room, get rid of another (i.e. new shoes, get rid of old shoes)
• Keep a box or bag in your room for donations

 // Study smarter, not harder

There’s a term commonly used that refers to doing something smarter, not necessarily harder. The same applies to your schoolwork. Studying harder is not the answer, but if you’re smart about the way you study, you’ll find your marks improve dramatically without much effort.

// Create a timetable
for your week with half an hour blocks. Using Microsoft Excel is a great way to do this. Block out the regular school hours and add in the after-school activities, the regular family things, etc. Once you’ve put in all the weekly activities look at the time left. If you’ve got 3 hours after school before dinner at 6:30pm schedule in 30 mins afternoon tea/relax time then an hour or two of homework and assignments. Have a 15-minute break in between to refresh your mind.

Spend each half hour of your Study Time on each subject. If you’ve got a Maths exam, Science assignment, English oral and PE assessment coming up start with the subject due earliest. You might do 30 mins on English, 30 on Science, 15 min break, 30 on PE and then 30 mins on Maths Study. Turn off your mobile and ignore Facebook and get into those assessments. Staying focused and switching activities after 30 mins is a great relief for your brain.

You can also create a Term Timetable – showing what assessments are due and when. Then you can easily begin planning your daily Study Schedule to give yourself plenty of time to get those assessments done.

// Speak words of kindness

Heard the phrase, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all”? You may have had a bad attitude in the past because you’re stressed, overwhelmed and not coping with life. Getting yourself organised will be the turning point of making your parents back off because they’ll see you acting maturely and responsibly and they’ll respect that. Once they see that your plan to get organised is not a once off event they’ll stop nagging you and you’ll have a better relationship. Once your relationship with your parents improves you’ll find you’re happier and nicer to other people. Even your little brother.

If you’re tired of your parents bugging you, get organised! You’ll have a clearer mind, a better attitude to deal with any issues that come your way, your marks will improve and your oldies will get off your back.

What have you got to lose?

// GUEST CONTRIBUTOR 

Bonnie Black

Bonnie Black’s background is in Primary Teaching so she has a natural affinity with children and has worked extensively with them in creating productive study spaces and organised schedules. In 2011 Bonnie created Little Miss Organised, specialising in domestic de-cluttering, deceased estates and organising skills for children. Bonnie and her team work one-on-one with students all over Australia and are dedicated to creating a generation of organised teens. Bonnie is now an Expert Member of the Australasian Association of Professional Organisers and was awarded Best Young Entrepreneur in 2012 at the Commonwealth Redland Business Awards. You can also hear Bonnie sharing her tips and advice as The Organising Queen on Brisbane’s 96.5 fm.

To find out more or get in contact with the team at Little Miss Organised please call 1300 737 121, visit their website or join the conversation on Facebook.

Around 1 in 6  young people have anxiety, and because adolescence is such a period of change it can be hard to tell the difference between normal teenager behaviour and anxiety. This article will inform and help you to be a supportive friend if you think your friend could be suffering- and of course if you feel you are the one with anxiety then the information will work for you too.

// Warning Signs of Anxiety

• Not sleeping properly – either having trouble sleeping at night or spending time each day having a nanna nap
• Dropping out of the crowd – doesn’t return texts and isn’t as keen about going out with the group anymore
• Going out of control – used to be quite sensible but now involved in risk taking activities – using drugs, drinking heavily
• Feeling down – cries a lot more than usual, is negative about everything, has gained (or lost) a lot of weight and often over reacts to what people say
• Looks (and feel{} bad – lost interest in their appearance and walks around looking angry and moody all the time
• Has an attitude problem – doesn’t talk very often and when they do they snap at you
• Can’t go out because of anxiety – doesn’t like leaving their comfort zone of home and comes up with all sorts of excuses

// What to Do

The first thing you should do if you think your friend might be suffering with anxiety is to talk to them about it. Ask them what is going on and if they are feeling okay. Of course they may come up with all sorts of excuses but listen hard and try and hear the real message.

They may not want to talk to you at that particular time but don’t give in easily – find a more appropriate time and place and ask again. Just make sure you don’t trivialise the problem and tell them to ‘snap out of it’ – I can assure you this just isn’t helpful.

The next step is to encourage them to seek help – and I would strongly recommend tyou do this bit together. Maybe there is someone at school (perhaps a student welfare teacher) who would be a good starting point. They may be able to help you directly or will certainly know of people who can. It’s always a good thing to involve parents whenever possible. There are some great online resources too – check out these websites:

• www.headspace.org.au
• www.youthbeyondblue.com
• www.reachout.com
• www.kidshelp.com.au

Make sure that you don’t get so involved in other people’s issues that you don’t forget to take care of yourself. Imagine if a doctor accepted everybody’s illness for themselves – it would soon put them out of work.

// The Bigger Picture

Anxiety is often the 3^rd stage in a process. When anxiety is actually happening it’s often because a trigger has been activated. Let me give you an example – my father died when I was 8 years old and he was buried in a particular town {in North West England}.

I know that whenever I go that town it will trigger an emotion in me – the trigger itself is not necessarily bad but if we can recognise it then we can deal with it. In my case I can either find another way to travel that avoids the town or to mentally and emotionally prepare myself in advance. {It’s the same when it would have been Dad’s birthday or the anniversary of the day he died}.

Knowing and eliminating the triggers will reduce the number of times that anxiety affects us.

The stage before the trigger often relates to some of life’s “stuff” – things that have happened to us that whilst becoming part of who we are, can sometimes cause us pain. If our ‘stuff’ can be worked on {definitely with professional} then it can reduce the triggers and ultimately reduce the anxiety.

In my case, by working through issues of grief and fathering I have been able to ‘come to terms’ {note I did NOT say ‘get over’} my dad’s death to the point where I can live without it being too troublesome.

So ….

If it is you – then find a friend, seek help from your parents or go and see a doctor/teacher. If you are worried about your friend – talk to them. There is help out there and you don’t need to suffer alone.

// CONTRIBUTOR

Nigel Lane :: Youth Worker

Nigel is a veteran youth worker with 20 years of experience whose passion is to unlock youth potential. In his youth work career, Nigel spent time working inside a number of schools, both as an occasional visitor, a regular contractor and even a full time employee. He speaks to several young people and/or families individually every week to help them realise their potential and achieve their dreams.

In addition, he has hundreds of conversations online with both young people he has never met and those he has known for over fifteen years. Nigel mentors young people from all walks of life. You can contact him via www.nigellane.com.au

In the upcoming weeks, I’ll be doing an exciting 4-part series on skincare: The Truth About Cleansing, Toning, Exfoliating and Moisturising. This knowledge is the most important aspect of good skincare and, when it comes to questions I’ve had from beauty clients, steps to good skin is definitely the most frequently sought-after.

There are millions of YouTube videos and blogs dedicated to skincare and advice on how to take care of your skin, what products to use, and everything else in between. My advice? Do not listen to them unless you know the authors of these ‘advice’ pieces are trained professional beauty therapists, dermal therapists or dermatologists.

‘Cosmetologists’ or ‘beauticians’ are not to be trusted when it comes to skincare either. Cosmetologists are simply people that have worked in retail selling beauty products, and beauticians only hold a certificate 3 or 4 in beauty, neither of which are anywhere near trained or qualified enough to give you factual and trustworthy information on skincare.

Beauty therapists and dermal therapists spend most of their training being taught, in great detail, the scientific structure of the skin, its functions, skin types, diseases and conditions, and how to treat each of these properly.

Our skin is our body’s largest organ, and should be treated with the utmost care and respect. We wear it our whole lives, and it’s a part of who we are and our personal style. Yes, everyone is different and there are a tonne of different things that contribute to the health, look and feel of our skin, but there are definitely steps that we can take to make sure we are doing right by our skin.

So ladies, keep watching this space as I take you through the ins and outs of skincare, and what you really need to know about cleansing, toning, exfoliating and moisturising, from a trained professional beauty therapist that you can trust.

Leave us your beauty questions and our expert Beauty Therapist will get back to you!

// CONTRIBUTOR

Mala McAlpin :: Editor-in-Chief

A Beauty Therapist by trade and currently studying a degree in Journalism, Mala hopes to take the beauty world by storm by one day becoming a beauty editor for an international beauty magazine while simultaneously freelancing hair, makeup artistry and everything else beauty.

She thrives on good coffee, has a ridiculously large and ever-growing makeup collection, and adores everything gorgeous and girly: 50s glamour, macaroons, French chic decor, Audrey movies, chiffon and flouncy blouses, high waisted pencil skirts and kitten heels. Her dream is to live in Paris and speak fluent French. Click here to read her blog ‘The French Room’.

// Red Balloon Vouchers

Red Balloon is a fantastic site that will cater for your mother’s everyday wants and needs. Red Balloon specifically has a mothers day section which gives you over 500 ideas to choose from.

If you want to splurge your savings, your mother will love package deals that involve facials, hot air balloon rides, cooking classes, high teas or push her out of her comfort zone by giving her a voucher to swim with dolphins and seals. She will have an unforgettable present that she’ll treasure in her memories forever.

// Legally Blonde Tickets

Spoil your mother by taking her to see the dazzling new Broadway show Legally Blonde, which begins on the 9th of May at the Princess Theatre in Melbourne. The Daily Telegraph have said it’s “Smart, sassy and spectacular” which would be the perfect treat for a mother who loves musicals and theatre. Tickets range from $59.90 to $99.90 and can be bought at Ticketmaster.

// Pyjamas

Treat your mother to a nighttime dream with the gorgeous “Time For A Cuppa Sleep Tee” from Peter Alexander ($49.90). This comfortable and luxurious nightie will be perfect for the times your mother wants to lay in bed with a tea in one hand and a book in the other or curl up on the couch watching TV.

// IOU Mother and Daughter Voucher

If you haven’t got the funds to get your mother an expensive gift, create an IOU mother and daughter voucher. Write a heartfelt message and include her favourite place, or hobby and promise her you’ll go together and have the best mother and daughters day or night out.

// Breakfast in Bed With a Chalkboard Tray

What you’ll need:

• A baking tray
• Chalkboard paint
• Chalk

:: Find a baking tray.

:: Apply two coats of chalkboard paint on the tray which you can purchase from your local Bunnings.

:: Wait until it’s dry.

:: Write a cute mothers day message in chalk and serve a delicious breakfast in bed.

We love this one from Inside Out and think it’s adorable!

// Glitter Photo Frame

What you’ll need:

• A plain wooden photo frame.
• Glitter glue or glitter
• Glue
• Paint
• Stickers
• A lovely photo of your mother and you

This present will let let your creative inspiration flow. However, if you’re stuck with some ideas, you can spread the glue all over the frame and coat it in your favourite glitter, or draw glitter glue love hearts, stars or shapes around the corners.

You could also paint the frame your mothers favourite colour and put stickers or things on it that remind you of her to give it a personalised touch. Then insert your favourite photo of your mother and yourself and she’ll love the effort and thought you’ve put into the present.

Hope you all have a lovely mothers day and remember to shower her with affection and happiness on her special day!

// CONTRIBUTOR

Helena Hatz :: Columnist

Helena has had a love for writing and the media industry ever since she picked up her first magazine at the age of 13 years. Still to this day she’s obsessed with magazines and on her day off you’ll find her lazing in the sun with a vanilla latte in one hand and her eyes peeled to the pages of magazines in the other. She’s also got a passion for dance and loves to try new styles, and at the moment shaking her hips at belly dancing is her favourite. She believes in making the most of the day and having a positive attitude to what life brings.

Just picture it: they’ve left the room for a couple of minutes and their phone is sitting on the table right next to you, or someone has given you their Facebook password…it’s very tempting, and sometimes it’s hard to stop yourself. I’ve been busted with my boyfriend’s phone after he’s walked in from a quick shower. But reading someone’s private messages is crossing the line, and there a plenty of things you can do to avoid immersing yourself in this huge invasion of privacy!

// Ask Yourself Why

Before you cross the line and log in to someone’s account or pick up their phone, ask yourself why. It’s easy to tell yourself, I trust them, I just want to know what’s going on. But do you really trust them? And if you don’t, why not?

// If It’s a Partner

If it’s your partner’s messages you’re going through, the most likely reason is because you think they’re either cheating on you or flirting with someone else behind your back. When you’re in a serious relationship, trawling through texts or emails can sometimes be a huge deal-breaker.

Relationships are based on trust, and will always fail without it. If your other half catches you in an act that shows them you don’t trust them, it’s always going to result in a huge fight. Solution? Very calmly and reasonably let them know (without throwing out accusations) that you’re having these feelings and give them reasons why.

If your partner loves you and values your relationship, they will tell you the truth or apologise for the misunderstanding and agree to work on the problem so you’re both happy. Otherwise he’s not worth it. As Dr Phil says almost every episode, the basis of all healthy relationships is both involved receive what they want/need from the relationship. If you’re not happy, you shouldn’t be there.

// If It’s a Friend

If your friend is being secretive, constantly messaging someone and not telling you what it’s about, this can feel super uncomfortable. You only want to go through her messages so you know what’s going on, right? Harmless? Definitely not!

Everyone has a right to privacy. Being someone’s friend, no matter how close, doesn’t give you a free pass to check up on them and their communications. In saying this, a good friendship should include good communication. If you don’t like what’s happening, tell them. Again, in a totally calm, cool and friendly and way. A good friend should understand.

Don’t ever let a friend treat you like you’re inferior or not as good as her other friends, or she is the one crossing the line. Tell her you feel left out and it makes you feel crap, and you can talk about fixing it together. And if she doesn’t? You guessed it: not a true friend. You should always respect each other and above all, feel comfortable and equal. Both of you.

The key to any relationship, whether it be friends or partners, is respect, discussion and communication. You should never be receiving their information unless it’s straight from their mouths. If you don’t like what’s going on, always ask them so you can work it out together. Don’t ever cross the line and go behind their backs, as it will always end badly, usually with a big fight.

You can’t get away with it forever and you will always get busted. Oh, and did I mention it’s actually illegal to check someone’s messages without them knowing? Seriously crossing the line. Get that awkward conversation out of the way and I guarantee you, if they really love and respect you, it will take your relationship to a whole new, more trusting and happy level.

// Question Time

• Have you ever read someone’s messages behind their backs?
• Have you ever been busted for it?
• Have you ever been in a fight with someone for reading their messages?

// CONTRIBUTOR

Mala McAlpin :: Editor-in-Chief

A Beauty Therapist by trade and currently studying a degree in Journalism, Mala hopes to take the beauty world by storm by one day becoming a beauty editor for an international beauty magazine while simultaneously freelancing hair, makeup artistry and everything else beauty.

She thrives on good coffee, has a ridiculously large and ever-growing makeup collection, and adores everything gorgeous and girly: 50s glamour, macaroons, French chic decor, Audrey movies, chiffon and flouncy blouses, high waisted pencil skirts and kitten heels. Her dream is to live in Paris and speak fluent French. Click here to read her blog ‘The French Room’.

Have you considered that for yourself lately? Look in the mirror, do you see yourself as whole and complete? It’s so important before committing to a relationship with someone, it’s essential for you to love yourself. There is the saying that ‘perception is projection’. This means if you see yourself as someone who is complete, whole and full of love, that is exactly how you will view others.

// Do guys really dig confidence in a girl? 

The question really should be: Does it really matter if guys dig girls with confidence? By focusing on this, we are focusing on something that is out of our control. When we walk into a room full of guys, we have absolutely no control of which guys like blondes, which like great legs, or which like a great smile! Each guy is an individual and has already decided exactly what he likes in a girl before you even walk in the room.

The resourceful question then becomes, do you dig yourself with confidence? The answer is Yes! The reason for this is because confidence gives you options. Options gives you power as it gives you flexibility over your behaviour. By having more flexibility, you will be confident. Think of it this way, you decide to go to a cake store because you really want to have a slice of chocolate mud cake with caramel layers through it. You arrive at the cake store to discover they do not have it, so you leave disappointed and perhaps even sad or annoyed that you had wasted your time going to the cake store.

Now, if you arrived at the cake store knowing you were going to buy a slice of chocolate mud cake with caramel layers through it, or a piece of lemon meringue pie, or a piece of pecan pie, or a slice of blueberry cheesecake, your options of being disappointed have been greatly decreased. The more options you give yourself, the more flexibility you have, and therefore, the more likely you will be in achieving your outcome.

So, the point of the cake story? When you go out and there are guys around, go with the focus of perhaps to have a great time, or meet new people, or to strengthen existing friendships, or even to just go to have a good time. What men are in the room and if there are any there that will find you attractive is something you cannot control, so don’t even try to. Be you, be confident that you are focusing on what you can control and just let the evening be what it is.

By taking the pressure off yourself, you will have an energy of lightness and an element of fun around you. ALL people find this attractive. People like to be around positive people. By doing this, you will attract guys and not because you have the focus of ‘I am being confident because this attracts guys’ and if you don’t, you will go home happy because you had so many different outcomes to choose from for the evening. Just go and enjoy!

// How can being insecure affect your relationships? 

Every person on earth has certain needs that must be met. Each one of us unconsciously ensures that they are met. The difference between us all is how we are meeting them. Some of us have strategies we have developed that meet these needs resourcefully, and some of us have strategies that meet these needs in an unresourceful way. By being insecure, you are meeting your needs of feeling significant and feeling loved unresourcefully.

The reason for this, is because you are demanding for these needs to be met through someone else. You are being ‘needy’. You are looking for reassurance constantly from others. This becomes very draining on your friends and your boyfriend, and they will, over a period of time, get very tired of being around you. They may eventually, for their own good, need to distance themselves from you. The price for them to stay around you all the time will be too high.

// The ultimate tips to improving your self esteem

Love yourself. Know that you are complete, you are whole. Everything that you may have done or has happened to you in the past is in the past and you did the best you could at that time with the knowledge and understanding you had then. There is no need to forgive yourself, as this would imply you did something wrong. Just move on. As you look to your future, know that everything inside you right now is everything you need right now. Trust yourself.

Ensure that you are meeting your need for feeling special in a resourceful way, a way that builds both you and others up and does not drag you and others down. The best way to do this is to make others feel special. Yes! Give it away, it is not costing you anything. Tell others regularly what they are doing well and what you love about them.

Make sure that you are giving love and not expecting it in return. Give, give, give! If you receive it back, consider that a privilege, not a right. Do not demand love from anyone. If you want to feel love, give it away with no strings attached or conditions or rules.

// What are some ways you can ‘love yourself’ more? 

The ultimate way to love yourself more is to picture yourself holding a torch in your hand. Presently, you have turned the torch to shine on you. You are in the bright light of your focus. With you as the focus, your thoughts will reflect this as you are all you can see. You will continually be looking to how everything that happens around you, affects you. Take that torch, and turn it 180 degrees.

Shine the light on others. Have as your focus how you can serve others. The bottom line is pretty simple: those who ‘get over themselves’ truly love themselves. So, when you look in the mirror, if you see that you have baggage you are carrying or armour you are wearing, take it all off, throw it all away and put a giant smile on your face. That is the best resource to start each day with. Once you have that ready to go, get out the door and ensure that each and every day you love, learn, give and grow.

// CONTRIBUTOR

Dannielle Baker is a leading Mindset Specialist. She is renowned for her ability to discover what is holding people back from achieving success in their lives and breaking through their limitations to achieve amazing results. Dannielle is a qualified Professional Life Coach, NLP Practitioner, and Educational Executive. She specialises in human behaviour and helping individuals and businesses to create and achieve their goals and dreams. Dannielle is the Founder and Director of Ellevate.

www.ellevate.com.au.
0400 465 646
dannielle@ellevate.com.au

// THE RIGHTEOUS BUTTER

This was the very first S&G product I purchased, simply because of the raving reviews I had read online. As soon as I picked it up I knew it would soon become a staple item on my dressing table. The packaging really caught my eye as the container has quite a vintage feel (as do all the other Soap & Glory products) and is also really feminine.  I opened the tub and was immediately transported to a world full of fairy floss and marshmallows – the body butter is scented with Soap and Glory’s Original Pink™ fragrance and it is definitely one of the finer smelling things in life.

The fragrance Aside from its gorgeous scent, the body butter itself is a whole new thing to get excited about. It’s heavy and insanely moisturising (it contains shea butter and aloe vera!), without the greasy feel you get from some other heavier body butters. The cream is really quick to soak into your skin but still leaves your skin feeling silky soft! Not to mention it also lasts a lifetime – I bought this tub in April last year and am only just reaching the bottom of the container!

// CLEAN GIRLS SKIN SOFTENING BODY WASH

After my experience with The Righteous Butter, I thought I should try some other S&G products. I chose this body wash however it was scented with the Mist You Madly™ fragrance which is a lot more feminine and floral than the Original Pink™ scent as it contains natural vanilla fruit and orchid extracts. The bottle I bought was 500ml – needless to say I have only just finished this bottle! The body wash has a built-in moisturising matrix which makes your skin feel super duper soft once you step out of the shower.

// THE BREAKFAST SCRUB BODY SMOOTHER

Next I moved onto the Breakfast Scrub. IT SMELLS SOOOOO GOOD. Seriously. It contains organic cupuacu bio scrubs, bananas, almonds and honey extracts = the most amazing maple fragrance ever! It works really well at de-scaling your dry bits, especially the elbows and knees which are a major problem for a lot of people. You also don’t need to use too much at once as the scrub distributes fairly evenly when you rub it in. If only there was a shower gel in the same scent, I’d be all over that…

// CONTRIBUTOR

Megan loves everything fashion and beauty! She’s always on the lookout for new products to tame her wild curly locks, attempt to make her hair silky and smooth, make her skin glow and do numerous other things to mix up her look a bit. Megan loves to try out new makeup and hair looks from Youtube tutorials.

If only she was born in the 50′s to emulate the style of fashion icons – think Audrey Hepburn, Bridgitte Bardot, Marilyn Monroe, Edie Sedgwick, Grace Kelly and Elizabeth Taylor.

In her spare time, Megan likes to read (especially biographies) and listen to music (she loves Kanye West, M.I.A, Ed Sheeran, Lana Del Rey and Drake just to name a few) although she likes pretty much everything! Megan also likes to just relax watching TV – usually something funny like the Inbetweeners and the Mighty Boosh but sometimes deviates by watching old movies such as Roman Holiday and Breakfast at Tiffany’s.”

There’s a funny thing happening in lady land, and it’s by no means a new occurrence. It’s always been there in the background, quietly humming away, but always reminding us of its presence. What is it, you ask? Why, it’s the battle of the hair.

Just the other day, my mum and I were discussing the various aspects of our grooming routines (as you do), when something mum said caught my attention.

“I forgot to shave my arms today.”

Um, what? Doesn’t she mean legs? Apparently not. No, the not-so-new thing in hair removal is quite possibly the last place on our bodies that we’re not already applying hot wax to and ripping hairs from. And I can’t even remember the rest of our conversation, because I was left wondering if I need to add ‘forearms’ to my to-wax list, and peering at the hairs and wondering if they’re too thick or too dark. But it did get me thinking: have we travelled too far down the hair removal road?

Don’t get me wrong; I’m a firm believer in hair removal and personal grooming falling into the ‘each to their own’ category. But what bothers me about the whole idea of ripping hairs off my forearms is that to me, it seems to be just another thing to feel peer pressure about.

As soon as mum mentioned her devotion to bare arms, I felt left behind on the beauty road (and not just because my mum is doing something that I’m not, primping wise). I started to panic that my beauty routine has a glitch in it, and before I knew it, I was considering following what is apparently a not-so-new trend, and jumping on the bare-armed bandwagon.

So is this just another thing for those of us in girl land to feel obliged to do? Do we need to have smooth arms, a la Barbie, to be beautiful? I vividly remember my first conversation with friends when we first started to shave our legs. That was when we were 12, and the shaving and waxing and hair removal list has only grown from there, and become more infused in our daily conversations as young women.

So after some deliberation, I have decided that my arms will remain wax free- for now. Because while waxing may have weaved its way to my eyebrows, upper lip, bikini line, arm pits and legs (yikes, that’s quite a list!) I am drawing the line, and that line stops at my arms.

// CONTRIBUTOR

Lauren grew up in country South Australia, but was drawn to the alluring lights of Melbourne at the start of 2010, and she has never looked back. Now in her final year of her journalism degree, Lauren spends her free time trawling the laneways of Melbourne in search of new treasures. She is the ultimate girly-girl, and has an embarrassingly large collection of beauty products, perfumes, chick-lit and women’s magazines. She lives for fashion, and her collection of Jimmy Choo shoes are among her most precious possessions.

Lauren balances her girly habits with her AFL obsession, and trades cocktails and canapes for beer and pies on game day. If she’s not re-watching episodes of Sex and the City for the zillionth time, she is sitting in one of Melbourne’s fabulous cafes, daydreaming about her upcoming trip to New York, or slogging through a bikram yoga class. Lauren is inspired by florals, lace, travel, fresh flowers, and is often spotted jotting ideas down on any scrap of paper she can find. Click her to read her blog, La Belle Vie and follow her on Twitter @LaurenKruger26

Stephany Avila is a beautiful, strong, business smart and a well established Australian actress. Leading a cast of new actors, Stephany is only 22 years old speaks fluent Spanish, she mentors aspiring actors and she is also a writer. Stephany with her “go getter” attitude is now building her own creative empire. As you speak to her more you soon realise she’s not just a kind, talented and generous person but she is someone who is a strong and positive influence for young adults.

// You are currently playing the lead in teen drama ‘Clique’. How has it been working on the set of ‘Clique’?

Incredible, I always feel at home when working on any film or television set. The energy and happiness I feel when I’m working, it’s like nothing else I know. The crew and cast become such a beautiful community.

// What can you tell us about your character?

Well her name is Mackenzie Rodriguez also known to her friends as “Mack”. She is a sixteen year old who is very popular at school but doesn’t care too much about this. She is more interested in having a good time or being alone to think for herself. Her father is absent and she has a bad relationship with her mother. I think this is why Mackenzie is damaged, rebellious and very angry. She tries to fill the void and find love in all the wrong places. She’s such a real and strong character, I think this is why people can relate to her and the situations she gets into.

// Do you and Mackenzie have a lot in common?

I think Mackenzie and I are strong people; we can stand on our own. There are many decisions she makes that I would not even think about but that’s the beauty of acting, it isn’t me.

// How long have you been in the acting industry?

I’ve been so lucky that I knew what I wanted to do at such a young age and I also had my parents support from the beginning. I started working in theatre at a young age and quickly got into television and film. I got my first job on television when I was 12 so I’ve been actively working since. So it’s been over a decade. Wow, that sounds like a very long time. *Laughs* I have such a passion for acting and it gives me so much energy.

// You seem like a confident, kind and strong individual. Have you always been this way?

Oh thank you so much. To be honest I’ve always tried to be kind. My parents raised me well. Life experiences have made me strong but I think my confidence has come recently. I finally feel good about who I am and happy to be me. I am definitely an individual; there is no one like me. I love that! Plus I don’t think the world could handle two of me. *Laughs*

// Who are your role models?

There are four people in my life that I look up to and admire. My mother who is also my manager for her strength, creativity and the way she raised us. She puts up with too much from my siblings and me. She’s the most beautiful woman in the world.

I hope one day to be as wonderful as she is. My dad he has taught me so much about life and business. He is very wise, smart and has always been good at making me feel secure and safe. My sister and brother are younger than me but they give me so much strength, peace and make me laugh every day. These four individuals are my survival kit.

// You seem close to your family. Have your family been your support team?

We are very close. We know everything about each other. Yes absolutely their encouragement and support has helped me achieve many of my dreams. They’ve also hold me up when things aren’t going so well and I’m under a lot of pressure. I’m very lucky to have them in my life.

 // You recently graduated from university. Do you feel education is important?

For me studying was a good life experience. I learnt so much and got to know some great people. I think that’s the most important thing in life, experience. Getting an education helps particularly if your dream is to be a doctor but experiences are also valuable. Especially for an actor, experiences are everything. An individual’s attitude towards life is also extremely important when it comes to getting what you want. But I am going off topic.

// What are your goals for the next year?

I’m really excited about the next few months. I’ll continue to be an actress across all performance areas. It’s my main passion and I couldn’t live without it. But at the same time I am currently setting up my own creative corporation. It will develop, create and promote entertainment products and services. The company will span from a film and television production company to a design label and creative writing.

I’d also like to get involved with music and visual arts at one point. This business is going to allow me and others to be creative in any and every arts field. I want to build an enterprise that will be well respected in the arts industry and by the general public for creating the best quality products, whether it’d be scripts or good actors or jewellery, even lyrics for songs. I want to give people a gift and positively influence others through the artistic projects we develop.

With actor David Nash on the opening night of Clique (and with blonde hair)

// That is a lot for a 22 year old to take on board. What motivates you to create this incredible business?

I love business and being creative so why not have a company where I can be both the actress and the entrepreneur.  I think every artistic person will agree with me when I say it is hard. It’s hard to constantly stay positive, passionate and proactive in an industry where there is not a lot of funding.

This business is all about encouraging people to be creative in different ways, to expand and improve on their unique talents. The corporation will employ people that specialise in certain areas of the arts. There is a strong demand for great and inspiring art in this country and internationally, I just want to be a big part of this.

// You mentioned a person’s attitude to be important. Do you feel a person’s attitude is the most important thing when it comes to getting what they want and being successful?

For me it is the most important factor in my success. There is an amazing quote by Charles R. Swindoll which describes the value of a person’s attitude. Anybody reading this should look it up. I have this quote hanging up in my bedroom. I love quotes; I think they are so powerful.

// Tell us a bit about your personal life.

I have my amazing family that I try to spend as much time as I can with them. I have kind and supportive friends who understand my career and the demand that is on me. It’s important to get some “me” time but I do find it hard to fit everything in on a daily basis.

// Do you find it easy to balance your professional and personal life?

Easy? *laughs* I am very busy, it’s hard to have a successful career in so many areas and a wonderful personal life. I think because I’m young and ambitious I’m very focused. I’m blessed to have people who appreciate who I am and encourage me to do the best I can.

I love technology it helps with being balanced. An example of this is if I am going to be away on set for a few days I will call, message or snap chat my friends and family. I stay in contact with them as much as I possibly can.

// How do you handle being in the public eye?

For now it’s really good. It’s a real joy being a positive role model for others and I’m always open to helping people with any questions they have about me or their careers. I like sharing the knowledge I have about the arts industry and what worked for me and what didn’t.

// What would be the best advice you’d give young adults?

Be you, love yourself for who you are and be honest about it. That’s the only way you’ll be truly happy. Prepare mentally for what you want, work very hard and have a strong and positive attitude. If you do these things I guarantee you’ll be successful.

If you would like to speak to Stephany directly please like her facebook page to contact her.

// Why is it that when someone has a broken bone or an exploded appendix everyone immediately sends flowers and ‘Get Well’ cards, but when someone reveals they have depression or anxiety people look away, unsure what to say?

The reaction of others can have a HUGE effect on how a person feels about their mental state and how they deal with it. We all want to be accepted, seen as normal, and if we are apprehensive about the reaction of others, we may be afraid to speak honestly about how we are feeling. We can also be scared of our own reaction, I know I was.

I’ve had an anxiety disorder since I was nine but only last year, almost eighteen, did I fully accept the truth. Being so young when it started, I didn’t even know I was suffering from an illness; I thought I was weak and scared for no good reason. It wasn’t fun and looking back I realise how much easier things could have been if I’d told even one person how I was feeling.

Because I didn’t confide in anyone, others got frustrated with me, not understanding how I could be so concerned about simple things. This made me feel worse, and with the lack of focus on mental health on TV or in magazines, I felt powerless to stop these constant worries in my head.

// The good thing is that things are changing.

When I told older family friends about my anxiety, they revealed similar issues, admitting they hadn’t done much to overcome them. Nowadays, with initiatives like Headspace (headspace.org.au), help is available for young people dealing with a mental illness, or just having a tough time. Unfortunately for me, my body was actually becoming physically sick as a consequence of my poor mental health.

I’m thankful things got so bad because otherwise, who knows how much longer I would have stayed in this state of constant stress without seeking help? I found Headspace after I had my anxiety under control and I’m so happy to see an emphasis on being open about mental health. More people speaking out about their mental illnesses in the public eye have also improved society’s perception of mental illness. Once I had gotten a handle on my own mental illness through psychology and medication, I was eager to help others in the same situation.

I was inspired by singer/actress Demi Lovato, who’d had personal experience with mental illness. Instead of brushing it under the rug, pretending it never happened, she was upfront about her struggles and from her twitter mentions and fan forums you can see how many girls, who had similar problems, Demi has helped. I decided to be honest and proud of my anxiety. I discovered my mental illness was neither good nor bad, it depended on how I viewed it; I could make it strong and powerful.

// You’ve heard it before, but the best way to lead is by example.

I think as teenage girls, we are really impressionable.

We can use this to our advantage though, and help each other out. I spoke to my friends about my anxiety disorder, explaining why I’d skipped school and been so evasive during the start of the year. I also told them about seeing the school counsellor and – I’m not sure if it was my doing but – some of them started going to see her about their own troubles.

When we chose the nicknames for our Year 12 jumpers I chose ‘Anxietic’, proudly labelling myself as someone with an anxiety disorder. My wish was that, as I wore the jumper around school, maybe even one person who was scared of confronting their mental health would see my confidence and would be inspired to talk to someone about their feelings.

I prefer not to say I ‘suffer’ from an anxiety disorder, instead simply saying I “have” one – shifting my perspective and making my mental illness a strength, not a weakness.  It’s something we all can do; change our view on mental illness and eventually destroy the reputation it still has for some people. We all want to be a part of the majority and the more and more people who talk about mental health the less needlessly ashamed those affected will be.

I found through my own struggles with an anxiety disorder that mental health is equally important as physical wellbeing and a mental illness can be just as debilitating. But with enough information, and by bringing mental health further into the spotlight, the stigma surrounding it can be reduced and help can be found for those who need it. So for World Health Day, and just generally, talk about a mental illness like you would any physical one. Hopefully someday seeing a psychologist for anxiety will be as ordinary as seeing a doctor for a bad cold!

Image Credits :: Artwork by Laura Repetti

// CONTRIBUTOR

Laura Repetti :: Features Intern

Laura is 18-years old and has been an artist since before she knew the meaning of the word. She draws, paints, crochets and is currently studying photography. Her second addiction is shopping; her favourite place being a second-hand American clothing store, and she’s constantly wearing out her wallet on a new signature denim piece or a killer pair of cowboy boots.

Laura is destined to live in the USA; San Francisco or Nashville being her places of choice, and is an avid lover of country music. On weekends you can find her watching old Audrey or Liz Taylor movies, or staying up into the early hours of the morning drawing and watching Gilmore Girls. Laura has an anxiety disorder and lives with it proudly, hoping to inspire others to be open and honest about living with a mental illness. She never lets it get in the way of her dreams! All of Laura’s articles contain her own beautiful, individual and inspiring artwork.

Girls can tend to be too trusting when it comes to relationships and may not pay enough attention to their instincts, that intuition that helps keep them safe.  In general girls are more inclined to want people to like them and have a greater desire to be accepted.  It is important that we open up conversations around values and beliefs.

Friends are those people that we share a lot in common with.  We enjoy hanging out with them and they support each other.  Friendship groups share values and beliefs and welcome new friends.  Cliques are more restrictive; they have rules that set out who can be “in”, and how they should behave.  There can be a lot of pressure to conform to that clique, and it is usually controlled by a leader.  Think about what you believe in, it might even be a good idea to write it down in a journal or post it on your wall.  It is so important that you are true to yourself.

Are you being true to yourself in your friendships and activities that you do in a peer group? One of the things we can ask ourselves is “Who is the boss of me?”  If your answer is not “I am!” then it’s time to re-think your friendship group and values.  Do you need to work on skills that will allow you to take back control?  Building self-esteem, assertive communication skills and having a good understanding of what you value is a great place to start. Do not allow someone else to take the position of being the “boss” over you.

So what can you do if you discover “OMG I’m in a clique that I don’t want to be in!”? Are you in that group because you need to feel accepted or because you actually share their values? Revisit what you want and what you believe in, write those values in big letters and post them on your wall. If your values don’t match their values – then it’s a fail, and it’s time to move on.

// Keep an open mind

Sometimes being in a clique makes you miss out on getting to know other people.  Even one close friend whose values, goals and activities fit yours can make all the difference to how we feel about ourselves and the decisions we make.

// Do things that make you feel good about yourself

Don’t let a clique pressure you into giving up the things you enjoy.  Just getting involved in things that you love will help you meet people with common interests and enhance your sense of belonging.

// Think for yourself

Do not go along with what you do not believe is right.  Stick to your true values and do not be pressured in to going along with others.  True friends will appreciate your thoughts, feelings and choices.  You always have the right to say NO, and true friend s will respect that choice.

// Speak up

If you feel your group of friends is turning into a clique, stand up for what you believe in.  They may decide to stay that way, however they might also realise what you are saying is true and stop acting that way.  Sometimes it can be really difficult to actually speak out against something, however you can still stand up for what you believe in by not taking part in things that feel wrong.

We all find ourselves in peer pressure situations at some point.  Even if you have been very careful about how you have chosen your friends, there will still be times when you are going to have to make difficult decisions that your friends may not like.

There are a few things we can do to “peer pressure proof” ourselves when we find ourselves in those sticky situations.

// Have a plan

If you know there might be a peer pressure situation on the horizon – like a party on the weekend , think ahead and know how you will handle it.  Developing these critical thinking skills are essential to our safety and well being.  Decide what you will do and even practice what you will say or do – then when the time comes you will be prepared.

It’s not a bad idea to have a code phrase that you can use with your parents if you are feeling pressure in a situation.  One girl I met told me her code word was “mother”.  If she rang her parents and they heard the work ‘mother’, they knew it was sign to go and pick her up, no questions asked ( well at least not until the next day).

// Hang out with similar thinking people

We are less likely to find ourselves in sticky situations when we hang out with friends who feel the same way, it really does help limit the chances of peer pressure occurring.

Saying NO and being okay with that is super important.  You should never have to apologise or explain to good friends why you are saying NO.

// Ask for help 

If something seems dodgy and dangerous, then get help.  Friends can help friends and an adult may be necessary.

The need to be noticed can be so strong, and lead girls into risky behaviours that do not fit in with their core values.  Spend some time to discover your core beliefs and values and empower yourself by being true to these.  Are you behaving in a way now that you want people to remember you by? If you find yourself questioning what you are doing, reflect back on those values.

The most important thing that is going to keep you safe is your instincts.  We all have an inner voice that tells us when something is not quite sitting right with us. Often we will notice feeling uncomfortable and nervous and these are great signals to pay attention to; they are telling you something is not right for you.  Keep true to yourself; know who you are and what is important to you.

//CONTRIBUTOR

Catherine Gerhardt :: Director of Kidproof Melbourne

Kidproof works with students, parents and teachers to empower them with knowledge to make safer decisions.  In today’s changing world, it is essential that we keep up to date with child and family safety.  As a mother herself, Catherine understands that there are an overwhelming number of articles, safety tips, how to books and opinions out there.  How do you know where to turn to, and who to trust for the most relevant resources for your family?  The answer is easy – Kidproof!  We know that knowledge is key.

Contact Catherine

www.kidproofsafety.com.au

catherine@kidproofsafety.com

www.facebook.com/KidproofMelbourne

1 300 577 663

I’m sure most of you already know what sexting is. I’m also sure plenty of you reading this have sexted before, or know someone who has. For those of you know don’t know, sexting is texting someone sexually suggestive messages along with nude or semi-nude photos. There are some things that you should all be aware of before sending someone messages like these, things that make sexting completely XTL.

There is no reason why you should trust someone with raunchy photos of yourself. You are sharing a part of yourself with someone that should be reserved for a loving relationship. If a boy has asked you for nudes, he has already crossed the line, and there is barely a single situation in which those photos you sent are only seen by his eyes.

You may think he’s trustworthy, but chances are he’s just using you. If he wanted to be in a relationship, he would have asked you, and sending him nudes won’t make this happen. It won’t make him respect you either, quite the opposite actually. Sexting makes boys see you as a sexual object, not a strong independent girl who deserves respect and a loving healthy relationship.

I’ve been in quite a few situations where I’ve been around guys and they have asked girls to send nude pics, saying to the girl “Babe, I promise I won’t show anyone, I’ll delete them straight after!” After they’ve received them, not only have these guys shown everyone present and had a good laugh, but re-sent it to everyone on their contact list. This is completely XTL and you should never put yourself in a situation where this could happen to you.

Even if your boy is trustworthy, if he doesn’t delete your pics and one of his jerk friends gets their hands on his phone, those photos could end up in places you really didn’t want them to be, including online. The internet is an infinite whirlpool of photos and information, and once a photo is online, even if you delete from where it was originally uploaded, it’s still going to be floating around out there. Forever!

There are some scary legal consequences of sexting too. No, most sexting is not illegal yet (although the government is trying to make it so). But there are some situations where it’s not just XTL, but it is actually illegal. If you’re under 18, and the boy you’re sending naked pics to is over 18, and he is found with your photos on his phone or computer, he can be put on the sex offenders list for being in possession of child pornography. And he could stay on that list for 8 YEARS!

You might be thinking “that’s not right, I’m not a child!” but I promise you, I’ve studied this at university and in a legal perspective, anyone under 18 is a child. This means you are distributing child pornography, which can also land you in serious hot water.

That’s right, you could putting yourself at risk and also putting your guy friend at risk of losing his job, family, friends and much more over one naked or even semi-naked photo of yourself. This situation also works vice versa; if you’re 18 and the boy you’re texting is below 18, you could be charged as a sex offender and he the distributor of child pornography. Oh, and these rules apply even if you’re in a relationship.

While we’re on this subject, I’d like to point out the same about webcam. If you strip or get naked on webcam, you never know who’s watching on the other end if their camera’s not up. You will also never know if they have taken a screenshot of you on webcam and done whatever they please with it

So there are many reasons why sexting is XTL. You can NEVER guarantee that just the one person you intended will see your photos. You can NEVER guarantee that they won’t be uploaded. And you can NEVER guarantee you, or someone else, won’t get caught.

// QUESTION TIME

• Have you ever sexted?
• Have you ever received a sext?
• Would you stop sexting after reading this info?

Leave your comments below, we’d love to hear from you!

// CONTRIBUTOR

Mala McAlpin :: Editor-in-Chief

A Beauty Therapist by trade and currently studying a degree in Journalism, Mala hopes to take the beauty world by storm by one day becoming a beauty editor for an international beauty magazine while simultaneously freelancing hair, makeup artistry and everything else beauty.

She thrives on good coffee, has a ridiculously large and ever-growing makeup collection, and adores everything gorgeous and girly: 50s glamour, macaroons, French chic decor, Audrey movies, chiffon and flouncy blouses, high waisted pencil skirts and kitten heels. Her dream is to live in Paris and speak fluent French. Click here to read her blog ‘The French Room’.

Eyebrows are an important feature of our faces. They can define and change the whole look of our facial features and expressions, and when done well, can enhance our face beautifully.

Eyebrows should generally be left well enough alone, especially during teenage years, as your bodies are still developing, including your eyebrows. Their growth and shape will continue to change until you’re a fully developed adult, and you can do serious harm to your brows during this phase by over-plucking.

Some eyebrow hairs, when removed, will never grow back. Ever! So while you’re young (and in my opinion, forever) you should stick to gently and sparingly shaping your eyebrows with tweezers to keep them nice and neat and maintain the lovely natural shape that you were born with.

The same applies for waxing. Eyebrow waxes should be reserved for eyebrows in need of some serious pruning and definitely not for younger teens. Oh, and my number one rule? No home waxing. EVER!

Now I’m going to teach you the brow shaping rules the way I was taught during my beauty studies. This way is tailored specifically to your own face and facial features, leaving a perfect, natural shape that suits you without you trying to create your own.

Start by grabbing a paddlepop stick, or a small ruler- anything thin and dead straight, along with a lip or eyeliner. Take a look at the diagram above. This shows you where your brows should begin, end, and where your arch should be. When I say arch, this shouldn’t be a triangular arch like you see on celebrities, but the highest point of the natural curve of your brows before the curve back down again.

// STEP 1

Place the paddlepop stick, pointing upwards to create a perfectly straight line, from the bottom corner of your nose (as pictured).  This will show you where your eyebrows should start. Grab your eyeliner and draw a line next to the stick to mark where the hair in between your brows should be removed. Repeat on both sides.

// STEP 2

Again starting from the bottom corner of your nose, line the paddlepop stick up diagonally to reach the outer edge of your pupil (the black parts of our eyes). Draw a line on your brows where the paddlepop stick meets and this will show you where the highest point of your eyebrow curve (arch) should be.

// STEP 3

To find where your brows should finish, again starting at the outer corner of your nose, line your paddlepop stick up with the outer corner of your eye. Draw a mark where the stick ends up.

And voila! Now you have the natural shape of your eyebrows. All you have to do now is, very slowly without rushing, start removing the hairs to match the lines you’ve drawn. Don’t remove too many hairs from below your brows, and definitely not from above them. They key is natural but neat. Start easy and work your way up to it.

Eyebrows can be beautiful and elegant, and should never be drawn all over and removed till there’s barely any hairs left. Learn to love and appreciate them. You’ll thank yourself later.

Don’t forget to send all of your beauty Q&A questions to our resident Beauty Therapist!

// CONTRIBUTOR

Mala McAlpin :: Editor-in-Chief

A Beauty Therapist by trade and currently studying a degree in Journalism, Mala hopes to take the beauty world by storm by one day becoming a beauty editor for an international beauty magazine while simultaneously freelancing hair, makeup artistry and everything else beauty.

She thrives on good coffee, has a ridiculously large and ever-growing makeup collection, and adores everything gorgeous and girly: 50s glamour, macaroons, French chic decor, Audrey movies, chiffon and flouncy blouses, high waisted pencil skirts and kitten heels. Her dream is to live in Paris and speak fluent French. Click here to read her blog ‘The French Room’.

Do you love a good read? AND do you love surprise packages in the mail? If you’re shouting yes then keep reading girls!

Say hello to the TGSG magazine’s Book Club! Each month we’ll offer you girls the chance to receive books and write a short review on what you thought about it.

The following month, we’ll publish your review and release the next collection of books waiting to be devoured.

Don’t stress about sounding like a professional writer either- all are welcome here. We’ll help you out with grammar and spelling so all you have to focus on is getting across your opinion of the books.

Here at TGSG we believe reading is just as important as the perfect lipstick to match your outfit. It can take you on a journey to unexpected places, give you food for thought, new friends and lessons in life, not to mention improve your writing for that English essay you’re dreading.

// THIS MONTH’S BOOKS

::WHO NEEDS PRINCE CHARMING? BY AMANDA COLE

“Who needs Prince Charming to sweep you off your feet when you have the collected wisdom of 35 fabulous Australian women in a single inspirational book? This intriguing group of talented women, media professionals, entertainers and artists have shared their life lessons, tales of love and the challenges they’ve overcome in pursuit of their dreams.

Featuring Bianca Dye, Bree Amer, Kathryn Eisman, Camilla Franks, Tania Zaetta, Bessie Bardot, Tracey Gillinder, Dr Cindy Pan, Samantha Brett, Jessica Brown, Maude Garrett and many, many more. 

All you need now is to get cosy and be open to being truly inspired.”

 :: HARRY: THE UNAUTHORIZED BIOGRAPHY BY ALICE MONTGOMERY

“What happens to the boy next door when he becomes part of the planet’s hottest boy band?

When Harry Styles auditioned for the X-Factor, little did he know he’d soon be leaving behind school, his Saturday bakery job, obscurity and an ordinary life. One Direction made it to the final and won a record deal, and it wasn’t long before Harry’s face covered bedroom walls up and down the country. But how did Harry cope with his new-found fame?

And what happens when you take America by storm in a ‘British Invasion’? With gorgeous green eyes and curls that send girls wild, Harry has found himself surrounded by beautiful women. But what’s the truth behind the rumours? Here, his relationships with Caroline Flack, Emily Atack, Taylor Swift and the married Lucy Horobin are laid bare. And what next for Harry and 1D? This book will give you the low down on how Harry and the boys are set to take on the world.

// WANT TO REVIEW ONE OF THESE BOOKS FOR TGSG MAGAZINE BOOK CLUB?

:: Leave a comment below letting us know which book you’d like to review and why you’d LOVE to read and review it for our Book Club.

:: We’ll pick the readers and contact them so we can send their brand new book.

:: The selected reader has one month to read the book and send us a minimum 250 word review of the book to share with the Book Club.

 // TERMS AND CONDITIONS

:: TGSG Magazine will only post books to addresses in Australia.

:: Being selected as a TGSG Magazine reviewer for the month, you agree to send us a 250 word minimum review of the book to be published on Teenage Girl’s Survival Guide.

It’s one of those things that makes you want to pull your hair out in frustration and wonder why girls can’t seem to solve problems without drama like the boys can.

It’s bad enough when you’re the person who the rumours are swirling around about. For my friends and I when we were in high school, rumours usually started after a night at a party over the weekend.

Who kissed who, who slept with who, or who fought with who. It was a messy type of Chinese whispers, where the stories changed dramatically along the way, and before you knew it, apparently you’d shagged the local bad boy in the backseat of his car. Definitely XTL.

And then there were the times when the stories were deliberately changed along the way, all to make someone sound bad or look trashy. I remember a girl in the year level above me (who happened to like the same boy as me) viciously sniping that my weight loss was surely the result of an eating disorder.

I only found out about it when a mutual friend of ours confronted me, understandably concerned. I had to reassure her multiple times that no, I did not have an eating disorder, and yes, I was just throwing myself into netball pre-season fitness training harder than usual. It was definitely one of my least favourite high school experiences, and there was no doubt that this girl had XTL.

But what if it’s not someone else who crosses a line and starts a rumour, but you? And all of a sudden you’re the one who is causing someone else to want to stay under the covers all day? Sure, we’ve probably all done it at some point and thought nothing of it. It’s just a little harmless fun, right? Wrong. All rumours do is feed the vicious cycle of bitching, sniping and gossiping.

They’re toxic, and not only to the person who they’re about. What happens when your friends find out that you’re the one who started a nasty rumour? Before you know it, you could be on the outs with your friends, and become the victim of false rumours yourself. It’s a vicious cycle, and it will only stop when people stop not only spreading, but starting rumours.

// CONTRIBUTOR

Lauren Kruger :: Features Writer

Lauren grew up in country South Australia, but was drawn to the alluring lights of Melbourne at the start of 2010, and she has never looked back. Now in her final year of her journalism degree, Lauren spends her free time trawling the laneways of Melbourne in search of new treasures. She is the ultimate girly-girl, and has an embarrassingly large collection of beauty products, perfumes, chick-lit and women’s magazines. She lives for fashion, and her collection of Jimmy Choo shoes are among her most precious possessions.

Lauren balances her girly habits with her AFL obsession, and trades cocktails and canapes for beer and pies on game day. If she’s not re-watching episodes of Sex and the City for the zillionth time, she is sitting in one of Melbourne’s fabulous cafes, daydreaming about her upcoming trip to New York, or slogging through a bikram yoga class. Lauren is inspired by florals, lace, travel, fresh flowers, and is often spotted jotting ideas down on any scrap of paper she can find. Click her to read her blog, La Belle Vie and follow her on Twitter @LaurenKruger26

:: Gabby Printed T-Shirt Dress- Forever New

:: Bardot Vintage Denim Jacket- Bardot

:: Florence Wedge Bootie- Forever New

:: Pepper Clutch- General Pants Co

:: Cobalt & Gold Chain Necklace- Diva

// Look 2

:: Ex Boyfriend Tee- Sportsgirl

:: Jack Wills Fernham Jeans- Jack Wills

:: All Star Low Platform- General Pants

:: Agent Ninety Nine, Brighton Slouchy Beanie- General Pants

:: Alia Sling- Sportsgirl

// Look 3

:: Gemma Contrast Pocket Shirt- Forever New

:: Nicholson Skinny Jegging- Forever New

:: Military Scarf- Forever New

:: Martini Ankle Boot- Forever New

:: Gathering Eye 3pk Skull Bracelets- General Pants Co

// Look 4

:: Santana Foiled Peplum- Forever New

:: Lennox Super Skinny Jean- Forever New

:: Grace Tassel Lace Up Detail Shoe- Boo Hoo

:: Rachel Day Bow Bag- Forever New

:: Gold Metal Chain Link Bracelet- Diva

// Look 5

:: Alessandra Army Anorak- Forever New

:: Oslo Piped Pocket Jegging- Forever New

:: Knotted Tassel Scarf- Bardot

:: Jelly Beans Shoes

:: Gathering Eye Skull Stretch Bracelet- General Pants Co

// CONTRIBUTOR

Karli Smith :: Fashion Intern

Born and raised in Melbourne,  Karli is currently completing an online Freelance Magazine Writing & Editing course and is a qualified makeup artist. She contributes to a number of online fashion magazines and nothing {apart from indulging in a serious shoe and nail polish addiction} makes her happier than expressing herself through writing.

She’d choose to watch E! News over the regular kind and probably gets more excited about the red carpet during Hollywood’s award season than the stars themselves. She has a knack for buying clothes that continue to hang in her wardrobe rather than be worn; but won’t throw any of them away just in case she might want to wear them again someday! And putting on any of her numerous pairs of false lashes each morning  has become as routine as brushing her teeth.

Monday mornings are not complete without all the latest gossip and fashion magazines, she could spend all weekend watching F.R.I.E.N.D.S, believes her and Zac Efron are meant to be {he just doesn’t know it yet} and wishes she could be BFFs with Rachel Bilson; ohh to raid her wardrobe! Along with her dream of one day attending the Oscars or the Grammy Awards, she would love to travel to New York and aspires to contribute her work to glossy mags in Australia and overseas.

If you’ve answered yes to one or both of the above, you need to give Revlon Colourstay Whipped Crème Foundation a go!

This is one of the few ‘chemist‘ foundations that I’ve found actually does a really great job. Colourstay Whipped is a variation of Revlon’s previous liquid Colourstay success, but still delivers great results, the same long lasting wear and amazing coverage. The texture of Whipped is thick, ultra creamy and feels good enough to eat. It just smooths on skin beautifully, the consistency is really nothing like I’ve ever used before.

Colourstay Whipped will make redness, spots and most pimples vanish in a single swipe, enhancing your looks and not distorting them. And don’t forget it’s called Colourstay for a reason. It’s really hard wearing and really does last you all day.

Just set with a bit of powder for even longer more durable cover. If you have problems with redness or spots (as I do), I would definitely recommend trying Colourstay Whipped. It works really well on pimples as the creamy consistency helps create a mask all over spots, whereas many dryer foundations applied over a pimple just seem to slide right off and make a super annoying foundation circle AROUND the pimple without covering anything.

I know first-hand that having problem skin can really bring you down and effect your self esteem. Yes, beauty is only skin deep, but for some of you girls I’m sure it feels difficult to feel beautiful on the inside when all you want to do is cover up the things on the outside making you feel horrible, and you just can’t find the makeup to get you there.

Colourstay Whipped does feel very thick and will deliver maximum coverage, but once you’ve applied an even layer you’ll see that it’s not cakey at all, and looks quite lovely and a lot more natural than any other full-coverage foundation I’ve tried (and I’ve tried a lot!). Colourstay Whipped also has a slightly dewy finish- another trait that no other full coverage foundation meets.

This one really exceeds the expectations people have of heavy coverage foundation being way too thick, cakey, unnatural and completely changing the look of your face. I’ve done a bit of experimenting with this one, switching my foundations around every day and guess which one pulls the compliments every time?

If you’re not sure about committing to a new foundation yet, pop into a chemist or Revlon stockist and try a tester. Chances are you’ll get sucked in by the incredible texture and amazing feel of Colourstay Whipped, just like I was!

// CONTRIBUTOR

Mala McAlpin :: Editor-in-Chief

A Beauty Therapist by trade and currently studying a degree in Journalism, Mala hopes to take the beauty world by storm by one day becoming a beauty editor for an international beauty magazine while simultaneously freelancing hair, makeup artistry and everything else beauty.

She thrives on good coffee, has a ridiculously large and ever-growing makeup collection, and adores everything gorgeous and girly: 50s glamour, macaroons, French chic decor, Audrey movies, chiffon and flouncy blouses, high waisted pencil skirts and kitten heels. Her dream is to live in Paris and speak fluent French. Click here to read her blog ‘The French Room’.

Look no further; here at TGSG we have the essentials for the perfect study space and a few ideas to get you started on a great study area of your own that inspires you.

// Compact But Practical Desk

You need a desk that will cater for all your study needs. It needs to have enough draws to stop those overflowing notes from flying everywhere, and it needs to have enough space to fit your laptop and/or textbooks books.

This study space has the perfect desk; it’s compact and has six draws which can be categorised into readings, assignments, notes and books; and it’s big enough to have all your work and laptop on it.

// Comfortable Desk Chair

You will be sitting in this chair basically everyday, so be careful about the type of chair you decide you want because whilst you want it to look pretty, you also need to feel comfortable in it for the next hundred assignments.

You need to find a chair that gives you the right support for your back. It also needs to be just the right height to match your desk so you don’t end up with an aching neck looking down at your work.

Desk chairs can be expensive, so if you don’t want to fork out five-hundred dollars on a chair, op-shops and vintage stores could provide the right chair for you.

Want a chair that’s unique? Check out this cute study space with the most adorable chair that resembles an egg. This purple dreamy set up is soft on the eyes and will motivate you to study, and the shelves matching the colour scheme looks wonderful.

// A Laptop of Course

If haven’t already got, I highly suggest you think about getting one (or begging your Mum or Dad for an early birthday present) because you’ll need it and it will become your best friend- and not just for Facebook!

A great laptop that’s super popular and easy to use is of course the MacBook Pro. Laptops can be pretty expensive, but there are other alternatives such as renting a laptop for only $5.00 a week at places such as Rent Smart.

// Notebooks

Sick of carting that laptop everywhere? Don’t worry, I feel like that sometimes as well, that’s why you should always buy some traditional notebooks that are lighter in your bag and easy to write notes in. Using your laptop all the time with auto correct over a long period of time will actually decrease your spelling capabilities.

Think about a notebook for each subject so your notes don’t get messy and they are easier to read and go over when you need to study for an exam. Places like Typo and Kikki K have affordable and stylish notepads, like these ones.

The buffalo journal from Typo $14.95 comes in all different bright colours. We like this one because the yellow would standout from all that piled up work. With its sunny scheme staring at you, how could you not be tempted to write your study notes in it?

The 3 in 1 Kikki K A4 Essential Notebook Lined 3pk package valued at $16.95 is great for work. We’re in love with the adorable colour scheme of bright pink and orange and one could be great for a revision book you’ll need for exams.

// Pencil and Pen Holders

To save the messy arrangement of leaving your pens scattered everywhere on your desk, invest in a pen and pencil holder that you even can create yourself to save yourself some money. Cheapo two dollar shops come in handy for a simple creation like this, and something like a pretty glass can work as well. Again, typo is a great place for these!

Don’t forget some lovely book and paper holders for the important stuff you’re currently working on, so it doesn’t get lost in the craziness!

// Calendar and Diary

Think about hanging up a calendar next to your desk so you can fill in it with appointments, assignment due dates or anything study related to remind you of the tasks you need to get done. Take a look at this quirky and gorgeous home made wall calendar.

Remember, your study space is meant to reflect and capture your creativity, what inspires you, and to an escape where your mind is free from distractions and be surrounded by what makes you work your best! Good luck girls and happy decorating!

// CONTRIBUTOR

Helena Hatz :: Columnist

Helena has had a love for writing and the media industry ever since she picked up her first magazine at the age of 13 years. Still to this day she’s obsessed with magazines and on her day off you’ll find her lazing in the sun with a vanilla latte in one hand and her eyes peeled to the pages of magazines in the other. She’s also got a passion for dance and loves to try new styles, and at the moment shaking her hips at belly dancing is her favourite. She believes in making the most of the day and having a positive attitude to what life brings.

Just how far would you go to fit in?

Have you ever crossed the line to fit in?

For the majority of us, high school is a nightmare. For some, it’s the insane amount of homework that gets them down. Others, because your dream guy has been in the same class as you for 3 years running and still has no idea who you are.

And for a lot of other girls, who feel anxious at the thought of yet another day in high school hell, it’s because of how horribly hard it can be to fit in. If right now you’re thinking: “I’ll never fit in, people don’t like me, I’m just weird or not normal”, trust me: it’s normal!

So when is it XTL to try and fit in? To be someone you’re not to convince other people to like you?

I’ve witnessed it all throughout high school and now into my early 20s. When you’re in school, the most important thing in the world is to fit in, to have friends, to be liked. Coz let’s face it, is there any worse nightmare than eating lunch alone and surrounded by empty chairs in classes every day for 6 whole years!? At the time, no, there isn’t a worse nightmare.

So yes, there’s a fair enough reason for girls wanting to fit in. Nobody likes to be alone. But is changing yourself, your beliefs and your attitude, to fit in with other girls worth it? Or just XTL?

Here’s something to get you thinking: sure, you might have some great friends after these efforts… but who are they really friends with? Because it isn’t you, not really. They’re friends with the person you’ve made up, the person you’ve forced yourself to be so the others will accept you. Having to monitor your every sentence and thinking ‘will they still like me if I say that?’ before it comes out of your mouth is definitely XTL!

I heard a great quote once that went something like this: “If you don’t tell lies, you won’t have to remember anything”.

Meaning you shouldn’t have to keep track of every lie you’ve told so you don’t get busted. Tell the truth and you won’t have to remember the lies. It will come easily because it’s true. And changing yourself to be like someone else? It is, a little bit, lying.

Here are some examples of crossing the line to fit in:

• Spreading rumours and being nasty to someone because your ‘friends’ don’t like her. Don’t judge people on the basis of what other people say. Make up your own mind about them. They could end up being a great person or even a close friend if you get to know them.
• Ever smoked to fit in? I know plenty of girls that have. Trust me, I’ve been there. Nobody will hate you for not joining in, and if they do they are definitely not worth knowing! Don’t EVER feel pressured to do this.
• Skipping lunch at school because the other girls aren’t eating: one of the worst things to do! Seriously unhealthy, you need to eat so your body grows properly (don’t you want to get any taller!?) you won’t be able to concentrate in class and if you think it will make you skinnier: it wont!
  Starving yourself during the day and pigging out at home will actually tend to make you gain weight, not to mention seriously bad for your health and body.
• Peer pressure: you should never do anything you don’t want to. Now, I’m not going to pretend these situations are easy to get out of: some teens can be ruthless! If you feel trapped and can’t get out or say no, just pretend to take a phone call and get yourself out of there!

Being someone else to make yourself fit in is definitely XTL, especially if you are putting yourself or your health in danger. It’s completely exhausting, leaves you unfulfilled, depressed, feeling like you don’t have anyone around you that gets you, and you put yourself in real danger of losing your true identity.

Isn’t it better to be surrounded by loving people that you have lots in common with rather than just being around people you think you should be friends with?

It’s true what they say about if a friend leaves you behind, they’re not worth having as a friend anyway. Your friends, boyfriend and everyone in your life should accept and enjoy you when you’re just being you, and not receive any nasty surprises later down the track when you do start acting like yourself!

Do what you love, share things about yourself with others and say what’s on your mind without fear of being judged! It may be scary putting your whole self out there, but you will make life long friends that know exactly who you are, and somebody will fall in love with you for every aspect of you!

High school doesn’t last forever…but there are plenty of friendships that do if you just be yourself! You have your whole life ahead of you after school, and you should spend it surrounded by people that love you for you!

// Question Time

Have you ever lied to fit in?

Have you ever spread a rumour to fit in?

Do you feel like trying to fit in has made you lose yourself?

// CONTRIBUTOR

Mala McAlpin :: Editor-in-Chief

A Beauty Therapist by trade and currently studying a degree in Journalism, Mala hopes to take the beauty world by storm by one day becoming a beauty editor for an international beauty magazine while simultaneously freelancing hair, makeup artistry and everything else beauty.

She thrives on good coffee, has a ridiculously large and ever-growing makeup collection, and adores everything gorgeous and girly: 50s glamour, macaroons, French chic decor, Audrey movies, chiffon and flouncy blouses, high waisted pencil skirts and kitten heels. Her dream is to live in Paris and speak fluent French. Click here to read her blog ‘The French Room’.

Scouse Brows are definitely a passing trend, and I’m sure that, just like a lot of passing trends, you’ll look back at photos of yourself 5 years from now and think “what the hell was I doing??”.

This thick, heavy, dark and angular look very rarely suits anyone, especially if, like the photo above, your eyebrows are about 50 shades darker than your hair! Your eyebrows should very closely match the colour of your hair or be just a couple of shades darker, as they do naturally.

The harsh angles look extremely unnatural and weigh down your entire face, bring all attention to your brows and give the illusion of a much larger forehead and smaller eyes. Very unflattering! Drawing on brows in circular angles instead of square will not fix this problem either. The girls in magazines or in the street don’t do it because it looks good; they do because everyone else is doing it. Don’t ever give in to trend pressure. Do something because you love how it looks on you.

My advice? Just keep your eyebrows natural, nicely groomed and apply a tiny bit of natural brown eye shadow if you desperately feel like they need more definition. Drop your makeup and step away from the eyebrow pencil!

Keep watching this site as I give you the expert advice on how to properly shape your eyebrows, the same way they teach Beauty Therapists.

Don’t forget to email your beauty questions to our resident Beauty Therapist!

// CONTRIBUTOR

Mala McAlpin :: Editor-in-Chief

A Beauty Therapist by trade and currently studying a degree in Journalism, Mala hopes to take the beauty world by storm by one day becoming a beauty editor for an international beauty magazine while simultaneously freelancing hair, makeup artistry and everything else beauty.

She thrives on good coffee, has a ridiculously large and ever-growing makeup collection, and adores everything gorgeous and girly: 50s glamour, macaroons, French chic decor, Audrey movies, chiffon and flouncy blouses, high waisted pencil skirts and kitten heels. Her dream is to live in Paris and speak fluent French. Click here to read her blog ‘The French Room’.

People who are bullied are constantly told they need more self-esteem and teenage girls are trying to get more of it to feel better about themselves. We all know that we need it but we haven’t a clue how to really get it.

What does it look like? How does it feel? What does a person who has it do differently? How will I be when I have it? How will I know I have it!?

// Secret 1 :: You can’t ‘get’ it!

Nope. You can’t. That’s because self-esteem is not a thing. It’s not something you can get more of. You can’t catch it and you can’t buy it, otherwise we’d have it in our weekly shopping trolley. And, it’s not something someone else can give you.

Yes, other people can say and do things that you like and feel good about. “Wow, those shoes are so gorgeous on you!” And you do feel good, for a bit. “Thank you!” Then you continue on, feeling not so great about yourself again.

The thing is, a lot of us don’t even take on board what others say to lift us up. “But, you are so beautiful and clever. You can do whatever you put your mind to!” You tell yourself that they’re only being nice but “I just don’t feel that”.

So, if how you see yourself depends on what others say and do, on what you can do well, and on what you own, then you’re guaranteed a bumpy ride. One minute you’re up and then you’re down again, circling in self-loathing.

The problem with connecting your self-worth with external things is that it’s not constant and it’s not meaningful. The feel-good effects are only good while things are going well. Have you noticed that life is full of the good, the bad and the ugly?

When the good conditions aren’t met you go back to, ‘I’m not good enough’, ‘I can’t stand myself’, ‘I have no real friends’, ‘I’m not good enough (again)’, ‘I can’t do that until I lose 5kg’, ‘I can’t do that, I don’t know enough yet’, etc.

The truth is that no people, no skill, and no things (phone, shoes, clothes, jewellery, car) can give you self-esteem; unconditional, non-judgemental and self-sustaining self-esteem. I guess the word ‘self’ is a good clue to this mystery.

// Secret 2 :: Esteeming is something you do for yourself

It is a process you do for yourself often to begin with, until it becomes second nature. It doesn’t depend on others or things. You can esteem yourself with the belief that you are worthwhile, valuable, and significant, just for being born, no matter what. No conditions attached.

// Secret 3 :: It can’t go up and down

It’s like when you look at a new-born baby and adore it. “It’s awesome!” That baby doesn’t ‘do’ anything to earn adoration. It is precious and awesome, just for being born. So, you either esteem yourself, or you don’t.

// Secret 4 :: Self-esteem and self-confidence are not the same thing

They are so very different. You can feel confident about what you do, like cook, surf, play guitar and drive a car. You may feel confident about cooking your favourite meal but when you cook something you’ve never cooked before, you don’t feel so confident. Your confidence in an activity can be more or less, depending on the conditions. It’s very conditional.

// Secret 5 :: Esteeming yourself is not the same as being ‘up’ yourself

Someone who esteems themselves has no need to brag or boast by building themselves up artificially. Esteemed people are okay with themselves, even when they stuff up. Because they know that what they do and how they think about themselves are two different things, and that they are human – one who makes mistakes.

How do you begin to believe and feel that you are the worthwhile, significant and valuable human being you were born to be? Follow these steps:

1. Understand the difference between self-esteem and self-confidence and choose to esteem yourself, every day.
2. Add self-acceptance, loads of appreciation and layer these with awe.
3. Adopt the belief that no matter what you do, even when you stuff up, you are still a worthwhile and valuable person, unconditionally, just for being born.
4. Confirm your belief often until it is second nature. Say ‘Yes’ to that belief.
5. Support your belief by understanding that others also are significant, valuable and worthwhile, just for being born – no matter their poor choices or mistakes.

Is this something you’d like in your life? I don’t know if you’re going to feel the difference sooner or later, so follow these steps and in time you will. Let’s not keep this a secret. Let’s share it!

// GUEST CONTRIBUTOR

Kate Rafter :: Life Coach

Kate lives on the east coast of Australia by the beach with her husband and two young children. She specialises in coaching bullies so they can choose not to bully, bullied people so they can empower themselves and also people who want a fitness lifestyle. Kate coaches our system of mind, body and emotions to help people through their personal upgrade so they can be their best. She loves to watch her children train and compete in their favourite sports and she loves to do spin cycling, yoga and pilates.

Kate Rafter, ACMC
Life Coach
Personal Upgrade Company
T: +61 (0)413 805 650
W: www.personalupgradecompany.com
Kate@personalupgradecompany.com

// Fine-One-One

In an emergency you call 911. In a beauty emergency, you call Fine-One-One! Benefit have just released this three-in-one cheek and lip colour and it is an absolute lifesaver. It comes in a gorgeous golden tube and is super easy to use and put away again with its handy up and down wheel.

Its three beautiful shades are pink champagne for a luminescent highlight, sheer watermelon for an elegant pink blush and soft coral for a peachy contour. Fine One One is super fine and creamy, just swipe along the apples of your cheeks- yes, the three lines of different colours do look a little silly at first, but just gently blend for the perfect shade of blush with a lovely glow.

It’s also beautifully sheer so if you want more pop just apply another swipe of colour. A little on your lips also creates an elegant and subtle peachy pink, to sum up in one word? Pretty. You can also easily control the amount of pink versus peach colour that goes on, just lean the tube in the direction of the color you want.
// Porefessional
If you have issues with large pores blaring out through your makeup, you really should give Benefit Porefessional a go. It’s a silky serum that you apply to areas with enlarged pores, and it will instantly minimise the appearance of these and help your makeup stay in place.

I have long had some serious problems with large looking pores in those annoying creases on either side of my nose, and makeup just refusing to stay there and cover them up for more than a few hours. You know the problem I’m talking about, when your nose starts to resemble a strawberry? If you’re unsure of what I mean, go out and get yourself some strawberries and you’ll know what I mean!

Porefessional has definitely been a huge help with this, my makeup has remained in place and I haven’t had to sneak into the bathroom to put more concealer on my nose every few hours throughout the day. If your foundation does still shift a little, you can easily blend some Porefessional over your makeup to re-hide.

Not just for your nose, Porefessional can be applied anywhere on the face where you have pore-related issues as well as any other areas you’d like to see your makeup stick a little more, like under your eyes.

// Fake Up

Benefit’s newest release Fake Up is a whole new revolution in concealer. You can instantly tell with one glance that this one in different from all the rest! Looking at Fake Up, you’ll notice that a ring of solid hydrating serum surrounds the highly pigmented concealer in the centre. This makes the application extra smooth and silky, it glides over your skin so smoothly and makes blending easy as pie without dragging your skin like a lot of other dry concealer sticks do.

This product is designed for dark under eye circles, as the concealer has a beautiful brightening highlighting quality to it, but I love using it all over! Its brightening effect makes it lovely to use on redness or dark spots really anywhere on your face. Fake Up is available in 3 shades: light, medium and dark, and comes in a cute and convenient lipstick-style twist tube.

// CONTRIBUTOR

Mala McAlpin :: Editor-in-Chief

A Beauty Therapist by trade and currently studying a degree in Journalism, Mala hopes to take the beauty world by storm by one day becoming a beauty editor for an international beauty magazine while simultaneously freelancing hair, makeup artistry and everything else beauty.

She thrives on good coffee, has a ridiculously large and ever-growing makeup collection, and adores everything gorgeous and girly: 50s glamour, macaroons, French chic decor, Audrey movies, chiffon and flouncy blouses, high waisted pencil skirts and kitten heels. Her dream is to live in Paris and speak fluent French. Click here to read her blog ‘The French Room’.